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In retrospect you often see things differently than you do when they occur, but the following is my truth, and it is what it is.

I’ve done my best to keep this as condensed as possible while trying to adequately illustrate that which occurred.

Please note, this particular situation began when I first arrived in Thailand – I was still very green, optimistic and very concerned about showing respect to the culture I was living in – both Thai and that of the gym.

Again, this was a gym where we all had to live together and he was the trainer the gym deemed responsible for Foreigners.

I couldn’t avoid him and felt that keeping things level was in everyone’s best interest – I was there to train and he had a lot of power.

If you do, from my experience, chances are the long-term gym residents will know about it, and if you don’t, there is the possibility that someone will lie about it, and people will think you did anyhow. When you’re here longer, things can get more convoluted.

I’ll illustrate with one personal example over the past year or so.

Nonetheless, in an act of defense I asked the other muay ying to watch me.

I requested she ensure that I was never left alone with him when he was drinking. However, shortly after his arrival, his behaviour changed.

Jak3 didn’t lay out the same line of questioning as expected. I felt as if I was watched at times, their eyes trying to read mine, trying to make something out.

He was neither jealous nor accusatory; rather, he invited me out for dinner with some of the nak muays and the owner of the gym. During this time, the trainer began to pay more attention to me.

It affected everything for weeks – my eating patterns, my training, my ability to speak Thai and at times, I seriously questioned if my mental stability was getting slack…was I seeing things that didn’t exist?